We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
she pinky promised me she was 18
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize
