He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
Randomize