ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
Randomize
