Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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