He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
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