Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
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