Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
Randomize
