everytime i eat a fruit i feel like i'm eating ovaries
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
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