still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
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