all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
