so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
Just promise me we won't die tonight. I can't have an autopsy report that reads "stomach contents: Tequila and semen."
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
Randomize
