I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
First date. He's wearing a tuxedo shirt and keeps asking me about our future children. Escape plan #3 is now in action...
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
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