I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
