your room smells of hookers.
And success
I introduced my face to asphalt last night. They didn't get along.
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
