Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
