My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
Randomize
