I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
You were upset that she was flirting with your boyfriend so I thought the best game plan was to show her my boobs and get her to make out with me instead. I am the greatest friend on absinthe.
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
try to milk me bitch
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
Randomize
