I wish I could be a nicer person. Or a more sober one.
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
I miss vodka workout Fridays
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
