Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
Randomize