im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Randomize
