you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
The power of my boobs compel you
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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