dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
Randomize
