You just made me feel so damn special
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
Randomize
