i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
Do vagina's smell?
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
Randomize