I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
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