Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
Randomize
