RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Randomize
