My brain says no but my pants say off.
Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
Let's just say that in a last ditch effort to avoid getting arrested I said to the cop "but I'm not even that drunk" and he proceeded to point out (in front of a crowd) that I had "fucking pissed my pants"
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
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