My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
drinking out of a sandbucket again
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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