So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
At the doctor. They're doing a flu test now. He was like "where do you think you got this?" I said "bachelor party. Strippers." he goes "okaaaay I'll put 'other'."
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Randomize