Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
i spent most of last night convincing myself that dan akroyd wasn't actually standing in my bathroom holding a dead chicken
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
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