I heard we made out
Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
Randomize
