There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
