The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
Randomize