mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
Randomize
