Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
i love accidental penises.
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Randomize
