it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
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