absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
Randomize
