Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
You told me you were going to invite all of your Tinder matches to the same bar on the same night and make them compete for your affection in a series of Lust Olympics. Winner gets laid.
Randomize
