You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
i like how i just referred to his pregnant wife as the "other" melissa and you didn't even judge me.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
Randomize