Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
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