um i just went through the in-n-out drive thru and meant to ask for my cheeseburger animal style. turns out what i actually said was, can i get that cheeseburger doggy style? been a rough weekend.
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Randomize
