Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
Randomize
