So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
Randomize