evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
So much rum. So many feels.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
Randomize
