Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
Randomize