So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
Hurricane my ass. I'm riding a god damn kayak down the flooded highway if it's the last god damn thing I do, god damnit.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
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