My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Randomize
