There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
dude, i woke up naked in her front yard...apparently i tried to leave in the middle of the night, forgot my clothes and decided,"oh heres a nice patch of grass to sleep on" I think god is up there laughing at me.
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
Just took my morning after pill in the library
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
Randomize
