Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
I wish i was in the wii world.
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
Randomize