...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
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